The 50 Shades of Grey book series and movies have taken the world by a storm. In 2012, the book became the first one to sell one million copies on Amazon Kindle. The first book in the series also became the fastest selling paperback, outperforming best-sellers like Harry Potter. It’s interesting to point out that the success is definitely not the result of literary brilliance. In fact, both the books and the movies have been subjected to scalding criticism. Still, the millions of female fans across the globe don’t really care what critics have to say. The reason is simple – 50 Shade of Grey offers them something that other book series have been missing.
As a guy, chances are that you’re not too committed to reading the books or watching the movies. Still, there are things you can learn from the 50 Shades of Grey craze. Some of this “knowledge” can even be used to up your game. Here’s how.
No Shame About One’s Sexual Desires And Fantasies
If 50 Shades of Grey is teaching one positive thing, it would have to be the unapologetic pursue of one’s sexual desires.
The protagonist, Christian Grey, is into BDSM. He doesn’t feel embarrassed or ashamed about sharing that information with potential romantic interests. Grey enjoys a bit of spanking and he’s also into dominating a partner. The book shows that anyone can find a partner who has similar preferences. Not being afraid about sharing such information will sooner or later result in complete sexual compatibility.
Being unapologetic about sexual preferences isn’t just to focus on BDSM or alternative sexual practices. It could be something simple and small that you desire passionately. There’s no need to give up on the aspects of sex that will give you satisfaction. You will find someone who has the same fantasies, if you’re not afraid to acknowledge your desires and talk openly about sex.
Women Enjoy Porn As Much As Men Do
One thing that has become clear through the 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon is that women are into porn as much as men are. The only difference is that women prefer an alternative form of it.
If you ever take the time to take a look at the books in the series, you’ll find out that they’re heavily filled with intense sexual descriptions. In fact, entire chapters are dedicated to the acts and the intricacies of sex.
While many women are not into adult movies, they may be excited by other forms of adult entertainment. Books are just one example. They live a lot to the imagination and they have a plot line – the biggest difference between erotica books and adult movies.
Women can be aroused by erotic material. Chances are that your woman isn’t into adult movies. Remember there are alternative forms of erotica. It’s possible for her to enjoy something else (books, sensual music, etc.) much more profoundly than the standard clip that focus heavily on genitalia.
A Focus On One Woman
Going back to Christian Grey, he has mastered the art of pursuing one woman, turning her in the focus of his attention and being 100 percent monogamous. These are male characteristics that most women tend to enjoy.
Laser focus on the woman that you’re pursuing is the one that will eventually deliver the results that you’re hoping for. Don’t scatter your sexual energy or attention on pursuing multiple ladies. The more attentive you are to one, the higher your chances of success become.
Your intent should be clear right from the start. Men don’t like mixed messages and neither do women. Don’t lead her on to back off eventually. Be a bit aggressive in your approach, particularly if you see that she’s enjoying it (here’s a clue – if she’s not enjoying it, she’ll end your efforts in their early stage).
Become A Sex Master
What’s the secret of being the best lover? There’s one very simple answer, an answer that so many men are unfamiliar with – foreplay!
In other words – in order to get what you want from a partner, you’ll also have to be willing to give. Women get much more pleasure from foreplay than they do from actual penetrative sex. If you satisfy her thoroughly, chances are that she’ll be much more willing to reciprocate.
Mastering the art of foreplay is all about practicing. The more you’re committed to finding out what your partner enjoys, the better you’ll get. What does it take to learn what she enjoys? Ask her! Do it while touching or kissing her body to discover the top erogenous zones and improve your technique.
Experimenting with different foreplay techniques is also worth the effort. Take the lead and show her things she’s never experienced before. Chances are that she’ll adore the fact you’re daring enough to touch her and stimulate her in places that nobody else has paid attention to before.
Sexual Experimentation Is A Good Thing
Sex is not a set of practices that you’re familiar with and that you know pretty well. There’s an entire sexual universe out there that’s waiting for you to discover it. The more open you are to the opportunities, the better your sex life is going to get.
Once again, this point doesn’t necessarily have to refer to BDSM. For some people, it can mean bringing toys to the bedroom. For others, it will be roleplay. Remember one simple thing – if you’re curious about something and both you and your partner want to try it out, you definitely should.
There are no taboos in the bedroom, as long as both individuals involved are doing it consensually. Talk about sexual preferences, negotiate with each other and explain what each one entails. Chances are that both of you will be willing to experiment, as long as you don’t come up with something outrageous your partner is going to be scandalized by.
Women Love The Alpha Male
There’s been a lot of talk about the evolving roles of sex and gender. Well, one thing has become certain through the 50 Shades of Grey Craze – women are still turned on by an alpha male.
A man who is attentive, focused, seductive and capable of following through with his pursuit is the one that gets the ladies fantasizing. Christian Grey is this kind of man. These characteristics are the ones that make the series so massively successful.
Every woman wants to be lusted after. If you focus on her, you take the lead and you’re a bit aggressive, you will probably be successful. The term aggressive here refers to the manner in which you pursue her rather than to physical aggression. It’s about being assertive, knowing what you want and how you’re going to get it.