As a man, you probably pride yourself in the ability to please a partner. What if we tell you that she may be faking? According to one Cosmopolitan poll, 67 percent of the 2,300 women questioned said that they’ve faked an orgasm! What’s even worse, 72 percent reported having sex with a partner who has orgasmed without doing anything in order to please them.
One simple conclusion can be reached from these numbers – many men don’t care and many women find it a lot easier to fake an orgasm instead of improving communication. While both partners should be concerned about each other’s pleasure, it’s definitely not a bad idea to take the initiative and find out if she’s faking it. Once you establish those lines of communication, you can start thinking about ways to make things better.
Common Signs She’s Faking It
So, what does it take to figure out that a woman is faking it in the bedroom? Here are a few of the most common ways to find out what’s going on:
- No muscle spasms: we’re talking about the muscles down there! Just like in the case of the male orgasm, the female one is accompanied by powerful contractions of the vagina. If you can feel those, chances are that you’ve brought your lady to an orgasm. Things become a bit more doubtful in the absence of the muscular contractions.
- You come simultaneously: this may seem like the romantic ideal but things don’t really work this way in real life. Usually, it takes women more time than it takes men. Most men usually require about five minutes to reach an orgasm, while for women the period is 20 minutes. Other studies paint an even more impressive picture – in some instances, women have required up to 40 minutes in order to climax. It’s possible for you to be sleeping with someone who’s knowledgeable enough of their body to come really fast. Still, chances are that she’s faking it at least some of the time.
- Intense moaning: yes, there are women who are naturally loud when they’re having a good time. Most often, however, it’s all a show. The reaction stems from what women perceive as a sign of intense sexual pleasure. Chances are that she doesn’t have to yell and moan intensely when orgasming for real. If she’s putting on a massive show, it’s probably an attempt to boost your self-confidence as a lover. Observe her reactions over a longer period of time. If you spot a lack of consistency, she’s probably faking it on occasions.
- No sweating: this is something that’s incredibly difficult to fake. An orgasm usually comes with an increase in heart rate, rapid breathing, dilation of the pupils and sweating. If she’s cool and collected, she’s definitely not had the big O.
- Multiple orgasms: you’re either an amazing lover or she is putting on a show if she’s having multiple orgasms every single time that the two of you get in bed together. While multiple orgasms aren’t impossible to achieve, it certainly isn’t that easy. You’ll have to put a lot of effort in the process and you’ll have to reach all of the right spots in order to make it happen. It’s just not likely for her to have five orgasms during a quickie.
- Her rapid breathing goes back to normal the moment you’re done: it takes the body some time to recover and go back to normal after an orgasm. Does your girl seem cool and collected immediately after the deed is done? If so, you already know the answer.
Things You Can Do About It?
While examining all of the signs mentioned already can give you some idea about how genuine she is during sex, the best way to find the answers you’re looking for is to have an honest conversation.
Communication is the only prerequisite for having better sex. If she feels confident and safe enough to tell you she isn’t coming, chances are that the two of you can start working on making things better.
The first thing to understand is that it’s probably not personal. The fact that she doesn’t orgasm doesn’t mean you’re a bad lover. Maybe she prefers another type of stimulation. Maybe she isn’t as experienced and she doesn’t know what it takes for her body to reach that peak. You should definitely refrain from feeling annoyed or troubled by the fact that she’s not orgasming.
A few things can be done to give her amazing sex every single time.
For a start, she may be faking it due to the pressure society puts on women. In adult movies, actresses fake a particularly loud and obnoxious orgasm every single time. This is why many women feel obliged to do the same in order not to offend their partner. When the pressure is off, she’ll probably feel much more comfortable exploring her sexuality with you.
You may ask her to masturbate in front of you or guide your hand to the spots that she likes to have stimulated. Observing a woman giving herself pleasure can tell you an awful lot about what it would take to get her over the edge.
Sometimes, the issue may be simply mechanical. If there isn’t enough lubrication, chances are that the experience will be unpleasant or maybe even painful. Try using a lubricant. There are even some stimulating varieties out there that will intensify your touch and make the whole thing much more pleasant.
Another thing you can consider trying is bringing sex toys to the bedroom. Let’s face it – sometimes you’ll need a bit of an aid in order to give her the best possible sex of her life. There’s nothing wrong with trying a vibrating ring or incorporating a dildo in the foreplay. She’ll love it and chances are that you’ll have a lot of fun, as well.
The final thing to remember is that a lack of orgasm may sometimes be caused due to your insufficient size, poor technique or a partial erection. Instead of feeling embarrassed and getting frustrated in the bedroom, there are things you can do about it.
The market features dozens and dozens of supplements that men can rely on to enhance their sexual performance. If you’re not happy with the size of your penis, consider trying a product like VigRX Plus. In case your erections aren’t particularly impressive, a supplement like VigFX can get the job done. VigFX is based on an array of vasodilators that improve the flow of blood and increase the size of the erect penis.
Good sex is all about being open with your partner. Feelings of intimacy, trust and safety can make it much easier for her to let go of insecurities. Talk to your lady if you believe that something’s wrong. She’ll be relieved to tell you the truth. Once you’re done with this embarrassing step, you can move on to doing sexual experimentation and making things better.